The final set of GCSEs start today. We are now in the era of final exams, so new to us as parents, but ironically exactly the system we went through ourselves as students up to 1987. The stress is inevitably high in this system, everything rides on a few hours of written exam.
The weekend has been full of stress-relieving techniques, anything any of us could think of was embraced by the offspring. Sleep happened, good food was eaten. Time was spent outside, thankfully the weather was lovely, sunshine definitely helps. There have been lots of hugs. Time was spent being silly and laughing. Music was played and listened to. Baths were had.
Most of all there was acceptance of what this period is – it is difficult and it is stressful, but it is also short term. In five weeks it will all be done and the offspring seems marvellously aware of that.
Whatever the results end up being, I am incredibly proud of the way he has dealt with this weekend of anticipation and taken control of his own wellbeing as far as he can. He has verbalised feelings, asked for help and taken on suggestions. I could learn a lot from him.
This blog turns out to be a good example of doing something productive in the mornings. I was not aware it was until this morning’s non-exemplary lack of productivity. Or in plain English – I am having a Monday morning. I seriously cannot be bothered this morning. The weather was tough this weekend, I am tired, it feels like light years to the next holiday and the daylight hours are getting uncomfortably short.
All this will pass I am sure, but I decided to forego even attempting a blog and just try and sort out in my head where I am and what I am doing this week. So, I was sitting with coffee, bullet journal and laptop. The latter to check diary in fact.
The teen wandered in and asked, with genuine interest “so, what are you writing about today”. Genuine interest. On a Monday morning. From a teenager. About seomthing his mother is doing.
That, my friends is known as motivation. I did explain – in a VERY non-exemplary manner – that I wasn’t going to write, because frankly I just need to get my **** together.
Actually, it takes ten minutes to have a think about what needs to be done in the next couple of days, it turns out there are plenty of meetings in the diary to keep me on track. So, here we are, a blog.
It’s another one about blogging, I really do need to organise a plan in this. Yet more **** to get together. I am hoping for some enforced downtime later this week, so I may just get around to planning themes or at least have more idea than waking on a dark wet October morning and thinking that I just cannot be bothered.
It’s one of those days where my parenting skills are challenged. Both the offspring are off on adventures, both have done all the prep for these adventures themselves. Bags are packed, travel plans are made and everyone is being independent. This is good. Both my offspring are teenagers, one is an adult legally. Them learning how to prepare and then leave me to go on adventures is the sign that the parenting has gone well so far.
The challenge is that I am finding it quite hard to not be involved. I have not been able to resist checking on water and suncream, my excuse is that it is unusually hot, but I have stopped myself from checking anything else. One is off to London. We live in the second city, so he has some knowledge of how to get around a city and a few tube rides in the wrong direction hurt no one.
The other offspring is off on his Duke of Edinburgh Bronze expedition. Again, apart from the obvious safety point of making sure he has liquid and sun protection in what promises to be two hot sunny days, he has packed and organised all his own stuff. As he should – the point of the award is independence, organisation and planning.
All of this sense is my head though, my heart is struggling. It is what it is, a phase of pushing them on to discover themselves. All the while feeling out of sorts as it is the opposite of what the instincts tell me to do. But I know in my heart that stopping them from making mistakes will only do them huge damage later. This is their life, I have the honour of watching them unfold, but not living them for them. Here’s to independence.
The weather this weekend has been better than anticipated. Which means some welcome time outside.
We hosted a sleepover for a bunch of teens in celebration of an offspring’s birthday. This is a group of tech-savvy teens, usually to be found in front of a screen inside. Yet they spent a large amount of time in the garden. A lot of this was in the dark rather late in the evening and it was not all that warm, but the call of the outside was strong. They were hanging out and chatting on the patio, just because they could. It’s interesting that despite their social lives now being hugely screen-based and indoors, they are still drawn to being outside. Not for a particular purpose, being outside is enough.
On a beautiful spring morning I paid a short visit to a Scout camp, well actually it was Beavers and Cubs, the children are aged between 5 and 10. They were so calm and content to be outside. Wandering around a field or hunting for sticks in the hedges was keeping them incredibly happy.
My own camping season hasn’t started yet, but I too find being outside is good for my soul. Getting a dog was one way to ensure we go out every day, and in the 5 years since he came to live with us, we have indeed been outside every day to walk him, apart from a couple of days of illness and some icy weather this past winter. In fact, when the dog can’t walk, I still go for a stroll myself. It’s not the walking that is the aim, it is being outside.
Now that the weather is better, we will try and eat outside as much as possible, and various people will be found sitting outside on the patio, not for any reason other than being outside is a good thing. Our garden is not well-kept, but it is an important part of our home, full of green. And chairs.